Title: The End of Her World
Fandom: Guiding Light
Characters: Olivia Spencer, Natalia Rivera
Category: Angst, but the good kind. Romance, Drama.
Rating: PG...for now.
Word count: 3,362
Summary: What if Natalia had talked to Olivia before she left the farmhouse?
Spoilers: For the 7/01/09 episode.
Author's Note: I took the s/l of doom and not only embraced it, but made out with it. Then we had little fic babies. Which is probably not the best metaphor given everything, but there you have it. Please to be not killing me for this fic. Also many thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lbecka and ![[profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
q_wordy13 both for the beta. I very much appreciate both of their words and insight. They are the bests kinds of betas that offered detailed criticism on both the writing and how it is written.
Disclaimer: All characters (Olivia Spencer, Natalia Rivera, Emma Spencer & Fetus Rivera) and situations belong to Guiding Light, Telenext, Proctor & Gamble, etc. I'm not them.
Stay tuned for the second part of Part Six on Friday, barring any RL issues on my part.
Part One || Part Two || Part Three || Part Four || Part Five
It's hard to be terrified with Emma's excited energy coursing through the car like a live wire, and Natalia is grateful for the distraction that the little girl is providing. She and Olivia are virtually silent on the ride from the farmhouse to the Bauer's. Emma's chatter never seems to stop but instead of being annoying the animated river of sound soothes Natalia.
"We're here," Olivia announces quietly.
Emma is practically bouncing in the backseat. She barely waits for Olivia to put the car in park before she unbuckles her seatbelt and grabs the rice crispy treats. She's out the door an instant later, but hovers near the car, knowing better than to run off too far without one of her mothers, but too impatient to sit in the car any longer.
Natalia smiles nervously at Olivia. They really are here. There's no going back now - not that she wants to - but this is it: the moment where they are going to make a statement in front of everyone about who they are to each other. It is a moment for boldness, and Natalia has always preferred to blend into the crowd instead of stand out from it. This time however, she doesn't have a choice. She knows what she wants.
As she looks over at Olivia, Natalia notices that beneath Olivia's confident smile, there is a definite nervousness in the way that she won't meet Natalia's eyes, her gaze flicking everywhere but there. That's when Natalia sees past the smile and realizes that this nervousness is for her benefit. She knows it isn't about the people at the barbecue. There's no one here - except, perhaps, for Phillip - who's opinion Olivia cares about, and only because she wants his cooperation to make Emma's life as uncomplicated as possible. No, what Natalia suddenly understands is that Olivia is scared this will be too much for her now that the moment has arrived. Or maybe, that this has always been too much for her.
It isn't that Olivia doubts her love, but she doubts her worthiness, whether Natalia will still choose her in the face of people's disapproval. When people are whispering about them and making snide comments will she still be willing to stand with Olivia?
But Olivia's doubts offer her a distraction, just as surely as Emma's excitement. It gives her something to hold onto as she looks into the face of her fears, and it makes her brave. How can she falter when she can have this relationship - this family - if she's willing to take the narrow path, where the way is not wide and easy?
Natalia smiles at her reassuringly, and reaches over to touch Olivia's wrist. "I'm glad we're not waiting anymore."
"Are you?"
"I am," Natalia says firmly, testing the words even as she says them, realizing she does mean them. "If we keep waiting for the perfect moment, or for everyone to be okay with us, we'll never be together and I don't want to have to wait forever to be with you."
The smile that Olivia gives her is brilliant. Olivia has a hundred different smiles, but this is one of the ones that Natalia loves the best. It is open and unguarded, giving a glimpse into the depths of her heart, made all the more dear by the fact that Olivia reserves this smile only for those closest to her.
"Then let's go," Olivia says softly. She glances back at Emma who's practically dancing with impatience beside the car, and lets out a small laugh. "Before Emma can't stand it any more."
The sun is warm on Natalia's face as she gets out of the car. It caresses her skin and suffuses her with a sense of well-being that she knows originates from the woman standing on the other side of the car. They're both waiting for her when she gets there. Emma is still carrying their offering for the barbecue and Olivia is idly playing with Emma's ponytail. When she sees Natalia, her hand drops to Emma's shoulder and she holds out her other hand to Natalia, who smiles, lacing their fingers together.
"Are we ready?" Natalia asks both of them.
Emma is oblivious to the hints of nervousness that still spark between them despite their mutual determination to see this through. "I can't wait," she declares loudly. "Natalia, are you still going to do the three legged race with me?"
"Of course I am," Natalia reassures her, flashing Olivia a smile at Emma's enthusiasm. They both love to see her happy.
Slowly they begin to walk toward the Bauer house, as Emma runs in front of them. "Are you sure you should be running three legged races right now?" Olivia asks in a quiet tone, so Emma won't overhear.
Her concern surprises Natalia - not that Olivia would be concerned, but that she hadn't even considered it. Her memories of being pregnant are distant - nineteen years is a long time - but what she does remember is how hard she worked the entire time she was pregnant. There was no stopping or slowing down. She didn't have the option then. One race is nothing compared to an eight hour shift of waitressing.
"I think it'll be fine." Natalia says, considering her answer. "It's nothing too strenuous - just a three legged race with Emma. It's not like I'm going to be playing football or anything," she adds with a teasing grin.
For a moment, Natalia can see that Olivia clearly wants to disagree, but then she nods.
"Okay." She pauses and looks over at Natalia. "I just don't want you to feel like you have to do anything. I know how...persuasive Emma can be."
"I think it's sweet that you're looking out for me," Natalia admits. "There was no one before..."
"I know," Olivia says, "But I want this time to be different for you. I want to be with you for everything." She hesitates. "If that's what you want?"
This is the first time that Olivia has spoken about what part she wants to play in this child's life - in her life - and Natalia is a little bit overwhelmed.
"I do want that." Natalia stops walking and reaches over to take Olivia's hands. "I want everything with you." It seems incongruous for them to be having this conversation now as they're about to walk into a barbecue, but they've never done anything in the way that's expected and they certainly aren't about to start now.
Olivia smiles again. "I want that too." There's a fierce look in her eyes that causes Natalia to catch her breath. For just an instant, she thinks Olivia is about to...but then that look is tamped down again and the tension between them eases. Olivia blinks and the look doesn't fade, but it changes, softening just a little. "You make me so happy, you know."
"You make me happy too," Natalia manages to get the words past the lump in her throat. They stand that way for a moment, looking into one another's eyes before they remember where they are and what they're doing, so they start walking again.
*** *** ***
They're still holding hands when Emma rushes into the kitchen ahead of them and they find Phillip sitting against the edge of the table. He glances at them, but his eyes are for Emma alone, bending down to talk to her.
"Hi, Daddy!"
"Hey! What've you got there?
"Beats me. Mommy made them." Which isn't strictly true because Emma was there with them the whole time, helping to read directions and stirring when she could. Natalia wonders at Emma's sudden shyness around her father. It isn't like the little girl, most of the time. She definitely has her mother's confidence and people skills.
"Oh, wow. You must have a really great mommy." Phillip whispers, even though Natalia knows he means for Olivia to hear what he's saying. It's the only reason he's saying it. She shakes her head a little at the difference between this moment and the moment when she told Olivia that Phillip was back in town. What a big difference a little time makes.
"She can hear you," Emma points out.
"That's okay, because I don't think I ever told her that enough." Phillip is still looking at Emma, not either of them. It's the only way he can say the words that he wants Olivia to hear. Natalia is actually a little bit amazed to be included in this private family moment; because that is exactly what this is - a family moment: mother, father and daughter all together.
Natalia is standing by Olivia's side but as Phillip sampled the rice crispy treats her mind wanders. Abruptly, she realizes that this is the first time she's seen this little family together. This is what Emma's family would have looked like had Olivia and Phillip stayed together, not the hodge-podge she has now. There's a brief moment when Natalia feels completely out of place and she's about to drop Olivia's hand and leave, when Emma darts past her out of the kitchen, rice crispy treats in hand and intent to distribute written all over her eager little face.
Olivia glances over at her with her eyes shining and laughter still ringing in the air. It's more than a friendly look and Natalia realizes that this is absolutely where she belongs.
"Well Natalia helped. She, she bakes." Her comment is directed at Phillip but she's still looking at Natalia.
He gestures at them with the treat in his hand. "You told Emma about the two of you?"
Natalia straightens at the comment and her heart begins to beat a little bit faster. She's resolute about this and she knows what she wants, but she can't help her response. It still makes her nervous. She's not used to people's scrutiny of them, even if Phillip really isn't "people" and he seems to be more interested in what he's eating that watching every move that they make.
"We did," Olivia answers him. "She seemed a little bit confused actually. I'm not sure she understood how it's different from when we lived at the farmhouse before."
Phillip's eyebrows shoot up and Natalia can see the question begging to come out of his mouth. She wonders suddenly how this will look to the people who know them. Will they assume that this has been going on for a long time? Natalia wonders how wrong that assumption would be. It's true that she and Olivia hadn't said anything to one another about their feelings prior to Natalia's aborted wedding, but their feelings had still been there, simmering under the surface of everything they said and did. She remembers telling Phillip that she loved Olivia and Emma. She had meant it then just as much as she means it now.
"I'm sure she'll understand eventually."
Olivia nods slowly. "If she asks you anything about us, will you let me know?"
"Of course," he agrees quickly, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his shorts and nodding affably. "Actually," he continues. "I should probably get back out there before Rick manages to set something on fire."
"Sounds like a plan," Olivia agrees with him, her chuckle following him out of the room. When he's gone, she turns back to Natalia. The smile that's been on her face most of the day when they weren't dealing with serious issues has returned and Natalia isn't sure she can remember ever seeing Olivia this happy for this long. "That went well."
Natalia smiles back at her. Despite her momentary doubts about her own place in this moment, she knows how much Phillip's words meant to Olivia.
"He's right, you know." She says as she steps closer to Olivia. "You are such a good mother."
"I hope you're right."
Natalia lets out a soft laugh. Olivia is such a mixture of incredible boldness and shyness. It isn't a matter of one being more true; both emotions coexist in Olivia. "You know I am," Natalia injects a teasing tone into her voice.
"Always," Olivia agrees fondly. Her expression turns serious for a moment. "You know that would never have happened if not for you."
"I'm sure you and Emma would have come up with something to bring to the barbecue. After all you are a gourmet chef."
Olivia shakes her head. "That's not what I meant. He kidnapped my daughter, Natalia." Olivia's hand drops back to her side and she clenches them into fists as she speaks. "And I was ready to kill him to keep it from happening to her again." The emotion almost chokes her as she speaks and she can feel the beginnings of tears stinging her eyes. "If you hadn't been there, it would have happened and I would have lost her anyway. Now, we're standing here having a friendly conversation and he's telling me what a good mother I am." She shakes her head because she can't quite believe the things that have changed.
"You've had just as big an impact on my life, you know," Natalia tells her, emphasizing the words by reaching out to touch Olivia's arm just above her elbow.
"Right," Olivia says, but Natalia can hear the doubt in her voice so she takes a step closer.
"No, I mean it. Do you have any idea what you've done for me? And I don't just mean things like helping me get Rafe moved to a better prison or getting my money back from Decker. No one has ever believed in me the way that you do. You give me so much strength every day. I don't know what I would have done without you here in my life. Even when I didn't want you there, you were there for me every step of the way with Rafe when he was in prison. You and Emma are so much a part of the good things in my life."
"You can say that?" Olivia asks. "Today?"
"Of course," Natalia replies immediately. "Of course I can. Because if I hadn't told you - if I weren't here with you and Emma..." She shakes her head. It isn't worth thinking about. "I don't know where I would be, but I do know that I would still be scared and miserable."
Olivia blinks rapidly at her words and pulls Natalia into an embrace. Natalia sinks into it, savoring the feeling of being in Olivia's arms and reveling in the comfort and security that she has found there.
*** *** ***
"Don't you dare, Emma Spencer!" Olivia speaks sharply as her daughter runs toward her with a water balloon.
Natalia laughs at the way Emma comically applies the breaks to her forward motion, as she comes up behind Olivia and leans against her shoulder. Olivia smiles at her as she throws Bill to the wolves - or more accurately the balloon lobbing children.
For a vital second, he's distracted by Olivia and Natalia's closeness and the water balloons that come at him from either side catch him completely by surprise when they bust open on his shirt.
Olivia laughs wickedly as he shakes his head and dives into the bag at his feet. He comes up with more balloons, breaking them over the childrens' heads and sending them shrieking away from him.
"Here, sit down." She offers, scooting over on the lawn chair. "I promise I won't bite." Her tone, however, promises all manner of naughty things. It sends a shiver skittering down Natalia's spine, but her feet are aching and tired. She sinks down onto the chair next to Olivia with a grateful smile.
"Emma looks like she's having fun," Natalia says as she leans into Olivia's side.
"She does." Olivia agrees, moving her arm from between them, and putting it around Natalia's shoulders.
Even though the day is warm, Natalia savors the gesture and their closeness.
"How about you?" Olivia questions. "Are you having fun?"
"I am."
"Ladies." Josh's smooth voice cuts into their conversation.
Olivia glances up at him but doesn't move her hand or shift to put any space between them. Instead she smiles at her ex-husband and often-friend. "Josh."
Natalia sees the amused twinkle in her eye and is glad that someone is getting some enjoyment out of this at least. But this is Josh Lewis. She doesn't know him particularly well, but what she does know she likes, and she suddenly finds herself not worrying about how he will react. When she turns away from Olivia to face him, he's holding out two bottles of beer.
"I thought you two looked thirsty." Josh is smiling too, almost smirking as he looks at Olivia. It's not mean, but amused.
"Uh-huh," Olivia drawls, the disbelief clear in her voice as she accepts one of the condensation-covered bottles. "That and you look as if you lost a bet. I saw you over there with Rick and Matt." She dips her head toward the grill. "What were your terms?"
He shrugs and holds the other beer out to Natalia. She takes it with a smile, but doesn't move to take a sip. Josh takes off his sunglasses and runs his hand over his goatee.
"Not a bet really. More like I'm a wingman today." He continues at Olivia's raised eyebrow. "Rick is looking for love." He grins at Olivia. "In your direction, actually."
This time Olivia's other eyebrow joins its mate.
"Matt seems to have been shot down twice in the past week, once by each of you ladies."
"I told you he was hitting on you," Olivia murmurs. She's close enough to Natalia that her breath stirs the fine hairs on the back of her neck.
"I told Rick I didn't think he had a chance, but he insisted that I come over here and scout out his prospects."
Josh is looking too amused by this whole conversation, Olivia thinks. But then, two can play at this game. She's grateful that he doesn't mention their brief moment in the parking lot.
"And what do you think? Of his prospects," she adds a moment later.
Josh laughs. "Honestly, Olivia...I don't think he has a chance in hell." He glances at Natalia and she's shaking her head with a smile on her face. She shades her eyes as she looks up at him.
"I think you're right," Olivia agrees. She gathers up her courage and leans forward to rest her chin on Natalia's shoulder, hoping that she won't mind. But this is the reason they came here, to declare to everyone what they are to one another.
To her relief, Natalia leans back, and Olivia exhales as Natalia reaches around to cover Olivia's hand where it's resting on Natalia's side.
"Would you mind letting them know that she's very much taken?"
A quick glance over at Natalia confirms that she's still smiling as she says it but Olivia likes the possessive note in her voice.
"I can do that," Josh says with a nod. He smiles again. "Actually it would be my pleasure."
As he walks away, Olivia calls after him. "Thank you, Josh."
He raises his sunglasses in salute before he heads back toward the grill.
"Three down..." Olivia whispers against her cheek and Natalia laughs.
"The rest of Springfield to go?" Natalia finishes her sentence for her.
"Hey, now," Olivia protests gently. "I'm sure they'll help spread the word."
Natalia can't do anything but laugh again, because Olivia has a point, and she finds that it doesn't bother her. She's okay with people knowing about them, and more than a little bit grateful to Josh for making that moment so easy.
*** *** ***
Olivia is grateful for the shade. The sun has moved on from pleasantly warm and graduated to down right hot. Her shirt sticks uncomfortably to her back and she wonders how Natalia is faring out in the heat. She still has reservations about the other woman running this race with Emma, but knows that Natalia doesn't want to let her daughter down.
"What the hell?"
Fandom: Guiding Light
Characters: Olivia Spencer, Natalia Rivera
Category: Angst, but the good kind. Romance, Drama.
Rating: PG...for now.
Word count: 3,362
Summary: What if Natalia had talked to Olivia before she left the farmhouse?
Spoilers: For the 7/01/09 episode.
Author's Note: I took the s/l of doom and not only embraced it, but made out with it. Then we had little fic babies. Which is probably not the best metaphor given everything, but there you have it. Please to be not killing me for this fic. Also many thanks to
lbecka and q_wordy13 both for the beta. I very much appreciate both of their words and insight. They are the bests kinds of betas that offered detailed criticism on both the writing and how it is written. Disclaimer: All characters (Olivia Spencer, Natalia Rivera, Emma Spencer & Fetus Rivera) and situations belong to Guiding Light, Telenext, Proctor & Gamble, etc. I'm not them.
Stay tuned for the second part of Part Six on Friday, barring any RL issues on my part.
Part One || Part Two || Part Three || Part Four || Part Five
It's hard to be terrified with Emma's excited energy coursing through the car like a live wire, and Natalia is grateful for the distraction that the little girl is providing. She and Olivia are virtually silent on the ride from the farmhouse to the Bauer's. Emma's chatter never seems to stop but instead of being annoying the animated river of sound soothes Natalia.
"We're here," Olivia announces quietly.
Emma is practically bouncing in the backseat. She barely waits for Olivia to put the car in park before she unbuckles her seatbelt and grabs the rice crispy treats. She's out the door an instant later, but hovers near the car, knowing better than to run off too far without one of her mothers, but too impatient to sit in the car any longer.
Natalia smiles nervously at Olivia. They really are here. There's no going back now - not that she wants to - but this is it: the moment where they are going to make a statement in front of everyone about who they are to each other. It is a moment for boldness, and Natalia has always preferred to blend into the crowd instead of stand out from it. This time however, she doesn't have a choice. She knows what she wants.
As she looks over at Olivia, Natalia notices that beneath Olivia's confident smile, there is a definite nervousness in the way that she won't meet Natalia's eyes, her gaze flicking everywhere but there. That's when Natalia sees past the smile and realizes that this nervousness is for her benefit. She knows it isn't about the people at the barbecue. There's no one here - except, perhaps, for Phillip - who's opinion Olivia cares about, and only because she wants his cooperation to make Emma's life as uncomplicated as possible. No, what Natalia suddenly understands is that Olivia is scared this will be too much for her now that the moment has arrived. Or maybe, that this has always been too much for her.
It isn't that Olivia doubts her love, but she doubts her worthiness, whether Natalia will still choose her in the face of people's disapproval. When people are whispering about them and making snide comments will she still be willing to stand with Olivia?
But Olivia's doubts offer her a distraction, just as surely as Emma's excitement. It gives her something to hold onto as she looks into the face of her fears, and it makes her brave. How can she falter when she can have this relationship - this family - if she's willing to take the narrow path, where the way is not wide and easy?
Natalia smiles at her reassuringly, and reaches over to touch Olivia's wrist. "I'm glad we're not waiting anymore."
"Are you?"
"I am," Natalia says firmly, testing the words even as she says them, realizing she does mean them. "If we keep waiting for the perfect moment, or for everyone to be okay with us, we'll never be together and I don't want to have to wait forever to be with you."
The smile that Olivia gives her is brilliant. Olivia has a hundred different smiles, but this is one of the ones that Natalia loves the best. It is open and unguarded, giving a glimpse into the depths of her heart, made all the more dear by the fact that Olivia reserves this smile only for those closest to her.
"Then let's go," Olivia says softly. She glances back at Emma who's practically dancing with impatience beside the car, and lets out a small laugh. "Before Emma can't stand it any more."
The sun is warm on Natalia's face as she gets out of the car. It caresses her skin and suffuses her with a sense of well-being that she knows originates from the woman standing on the other side of the car. They're both waiting for her when she gets there. Emma is still carrying their offering for the barbecue and Olivia is idly playing with Emma's ponytail. When she sees Natalia, her hand drops to Emma's shoulder and she holds out her other hand to Natalia, who smiles, lacing their fingers together.
"Are we ready?" Natalia asks both of them.
Emma is oblivious to the hints of nervousness that still spark between them despite their mutual determination to see this through. "I can't wait," she declares loudly. "Natalia, are you still going to do the three legged race with me?"
"Of course I am," Natalia reassures her, flashing Olivia a smile at Emma's enthusiasm. They both love to see her happy.
Slowly they begin to walk toward the Bauer house, as Emma runs in front of them. "Are you sure you should be running three legged races right now?" Olivia asks in a quiet tone, so Emma won't overhear.
Her concern surprises Natalia - not that Olivia would be concerned, but that she hadn't even considered it. Her memories of being pregnant are distant - nineteen years is a long time - but what she does remember is how hard she worked the entire time she was pregnant. There was no stopping or slowing down. She didn't have the option then. One race is nothing compared to an eight hour shift of waitressing.
"I think it'll be fine." Natalia says, considering her answer. "It's nothing too strenuous - just a three legged race with Emma. It's not like I'm going to be playing football or anything," she adds with a teasing grin.
For a moment, Natalia can see that Olivia clearly wants to disagree, but then she nods.
"Okay." She pauses and looks over at Natalia. "I just don't want you to feel like you have to do anything. I know how...persuasive Emma can be."
"I think it's sweet that you're looking out for me," Natalia admits. "There was no one before..."
"I know," Olivia says, "But I want this time to be different for you. I want to be with you for everything." She hesitates. "If that's what you want?"
This is the first time that Olivia has spoken about what part she wants to play in this child's life - in her life - and Natalia is a little bit overwhelmed.
"I do want that." Natalia stops walking and reaches over to take Olivia's hands. "I want everything with you." It seems incongruous for them to be having this conversation now as they're about to walk into a barbecue, but they've never done anything in the way that's expected and they certainly aren't about to start now.
Olivia smiles again. "I want that too." There's a fierce look in her eyes that causes Natalia to catch her breath. For just an instant, she thinks Olivia is about to...but then that look is tamped down again and the tension between them eases. Olivia blinks and the look doesn't fade, but it changes, softening just a little. "You make me so happy, you know."
"You make me happy too," Natalia manages to get the words past the lump in her throat. They stand that way for a moment, looking into one another's eyes before they remember where they are and what they're doing, so they start walking again.
*** *** ***
They're still holding hands when Emma rushes into the kitchen ahead of them and they find Phillip sitting against the edge of the table. He glances at them, but his eyes are for Emma alone, bending down to talk to her.
"Hi, Daddy!"
"Hey! What've you got there?
"Beats me. Mommy made them." Which isn't strictly true because Emma was there with them the whole time, helping to read directions and stirring when she could. Natalia wonders at Emma's sudden shyness around her father. It isn't like the little girl, most of the time. She definitely has her mother's confidence and people skills.
"Oh, wow. You must have a really great mommy." Phillip whispers, even though Natalia knows he means for Olivia to hear what he's saying. It's the only reason he's saying it. She shakes her head a little at the difference between this moment and the moment when she told Olivia that Phillip was back in town. What a big difference a little time makes.
"She can hear you," Emma points out.
"That's okay, because I don't think I ever told her that enough." Phillip is still looking at Emma, not either of them. It's the only way he can say the words that he wants Olivia to hear. Natalia is actually a little bit amazed to be included in this private family moment; because that is exactly what this is - a family moment: mother, father and daughter all together.
Natalia is standing by Olivia's side but as Phillip sampled the rice crispy treats her mind wanders. Abruptly, she realizes that this is the first time she's seen this little family together. This is what Emma's family would have looked like had Olivia and Phillip stayed together, not the hodge-podge she has now. There's a brief moment when Natalia feels completely out of place and she's about to drop Olivia's hand and leave, when Emma darts past her out of the kitchen, rice crispy treats in hand and intent to distribute written all over her eager little face.
Olivia glances over at her with her eyes shining and laughter still ringing in the air. It's more than a friendly look and Natalia realizes that this is absolutely where she belongs.
"Well Natalia helped. She, she bakes." Her comment is directed at Phillip but she's still looking at Natalia.
He gestures at them with the treat in his hand. "You told Emma about the two of you?"
Natalia straightens at the comment and her heart begins to beat a little bit faster. She's resolute about this and she knows what she wants, but she can't help her response. It still makes her nervous. She's not used to people's scrutiny of them, even if Phillip really isn't "people" and he seems to be more interested in what he's eating that watching every move that they make.
"We did," Olivia answers him. "She seemed a little bit confused actually. I'm not sure she understood how it's different from when we lived at the farmhouse before."
Phillip's eyebrows shoot up and Natalia can see the question begging to come out of his mouth. She wonders suddenly how this will look to the people who know them. Will they assume that this has been going on for a long time? Natalia wonders how wrong that assumption would be. It's true that she and Olivia hadn't said anything to one another about their feelings prior to Natalia's aborted wedding, but their feelings had still been there, simmering under the surface of everything they said and did. She remembers telling Phillip that she loved Olivia and Emma. She had meant it then just as much as she means it now.
"I'm sure she'll understand eventually."
Olivia nods slowly. "If she asks you anything about us, will you let me know?"
"Of course," he agrees quickly, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his shorts and nodding affably. "Actually," he continues. "I should probably get back out there before Rick manages to set something on fire."
"Sounds like a plan," Olivia agrees with him, her chuckle following him out of the room. When he's gone, she turns back to Natalia. The smile that's been on her face most of the day when they weren't dealing with serious issues has returned and Natalia isn't sure she can remember ever seeing Olivia this happy for this long. "That went well."
Natalia smiles back at her. Despite her momentary doubts about her own place in this moment, she knows how much Phillip's words meant to Olivia.
"He's right, you know." She says as she steps closer to Olivia. "You are such a good mother."
"I hope you're right."
Natalia lets out a soft laugh. Olivia is such a mixture of incredible boldness and shyness. It isn't a matter of one being more true; both emotions coexist in Olivia. "You know I am," Natalia injects a teasing tone into her voice.
"Always," Olivia agrees fondly. Her expression turns serious for a moment. "You know that would never have happened if not for you."
"I'm sure you and Emma would have come up with something to bring to the barbecue. After all you are a gourmet chef."
Olivia shakes her head. "That's not what I meant. He kidnapped my daughter, Natalia." Olivia's hand drops back to her side and she clenches them into fists as she speaks. "And I was ready to kill him to keep it from happening to her again." The emotion almost chokes her as she speaks and she can feel the beginnings of tears stinging her eyes. "If you hadn't been there, it would have happened and I would have lost her anyway. Now, we're standing here having a friendly conversation and he's telling me what a good mother I am." She shakes her head because she can't quite believe the things that have changed.
"You've had just as big an impact on my life, you know," Natalia tells her, emphasizing the words by reaching out to touch Olivia's arm just above her elbow.
"Right," Olivia says, but Natalia can hear the doubt in her voice so she takes a step closer.
"No, I mean it. Do you have any idea what you've done for me? And I don't just mean things like helping me get Rafe moved to a better prison or getting my money back from Decker. No one has ever believed in me the way that you do. You give me so much strength every day. I don't know what I would have done without you here in my life. Even when I didn't want you there, you were there for me every step of the way with Rafe when he was in prison. You and Emma are so much a part of the good things in my life."
"You can say that?" Olivia asks. "Today?"
"Of course," Natalia replies immediately. "Of course I can. Because if I hadn't told you - if I weren't here with you and Emma..." She shakes her head. It isn't worth thinking about. "I don't know where I would be, but I do know that I would still be scared and miserable."
Olivia blinks rapidly at her words and pulls Natalia into an embrace. Natalia sinks into it, savoring the feeling of being in Olivia's arms and reveling in the comfort and security that she has found there.
*** *** ***
"Don't you dare, Emma Spencer!" Olivia speaks sharply as her daughter runs toward her with a water balloon.
Natalia laughs at the way Emma comically applies the breaks to her forward motion, as she comes up behind Olivia and leans against her shoulder. Olivia smiles at her as she throws Bill to the wolves - or more accurately the balloon lobbing children.
For a vital second, he's distracted by Olivia and Natalia's closeness and the water balloons that come at him from either side catch him completely by surprise when they bust open on his shirt.
Olivia laughs wickedly as he shakes his head and dives into the bag at his feet. He comes up with more balloons, breaking them over the childrens' heads and sending them shrieking away from him.
"Here, sit down." She offers, scooting over on the lawn chair. "I promise I won't bite." Her tone, however, promises all manner of naughty things. It sends a shiver skittering down Natalia's spine, but her feet are aching and tired. She sinks down onto the chair next to Olivia with a grateful smile.
"Emma looks like she's having fun," Natalia says as she leans into Olivia's side.
"She does." Olivia agrees, moving her arm from between them, and putting it around Natalia's shoulders.
Even though the day is warm, Natalia savors the gesture and their closeness.
"How about you?" Olivia questions. "Are you having fun?"
"I am."
"Ladies." Josh's smooth voice cuts into their conversation.
Olivia glances up at him but doesn't move her hand or shift to put any space between them. Instead she smiles at her ex-husband and often-friend. "Josh."
Natalia sees the amused twinkle in her eye and is glad that someone is getting some enjoyment out of this at least. But this is Josh Lewis. She doesn't know him particularly well, but what she does know she likes, and she suddenly finds herself not worrying about how he will react. When she turns away from Olivia to face him, he's holding out two bottles of beer.
"I thought you two looked thirsty." Josh is smiling too, almost smirking as he looks at Olivia. It's not mean, but amused.
"Uh-huh," Olivia drawls, the disbelief clear in her voice as she accepts one of the condensation-covered bottles. "That and you look as if you lost a bet. I saw you over there with Rick and Matt." She dips her head toward the grill. "What were your terms?"
He shrugs and holds the other beer out to Natalia. She takes it with a smile, but doesn't move to take a sip. Josh takes off his sunglasses and runs his hand over his goatee.
"Not a bet really. More like I'm a wingman today." He continues at Olivia's raised eyebrow. "Rick is looking for love." He grins at Olivia. "In your direction, actually."
This time Olivia's other eyebrow joins its mate.
"Matt seems to have been shot down twice in the past week, once by each of you ladies."
"I told you he was hitting on you," Olivia murmurs. She's close enough to Natalia that her breath stirs the fine hairs on the back of her neck.
"I told Rick I didn't think he had a chance, but he insisted that I come over here and scout out his prospects."
Josh is looking too amused by this whole conversation, Olivia thinks. But then, two can play at this game. She's grateful that he doesn't mention their brief moment in the parking lot.
"And what do you think? Of his prospects," she adds a moment later.
Josh laughs. "Honestly, Olivia...I don't think he has a chance in hell." He glances at Natalia and she's shaking her head with a smile on her face. She shades her eyes as she looks up at him.
"I think you're right," Olivia agrees. She gathers up her courage and leans forward to rest her chin on Natalia's shoulder, hoping that she won't mind. But this is the reason they came here, to declare to everyone what they are to one another.
To her relief, Natalia leans back, and Olivia exhales as Natalia reaches around to cover Olivia's hand where it's resting on Natalia's side.
"Would you mind letting them know that she's very much taken?"
A quick glance over at Natalia confirms that she's still smiling as she says it but Olivia likes the possessive note in her voice.
"I can do that," Josh says with a nod. He smiles again. "Actually it would be my pleasure."
As he walks away, Olivia calls after him. "Thank you, Josh."
He raises his sunglasses in salute before he heads back toward the grill.
"Three down..." Olivia whispers against her cheek and Natalia laughs.
"The rest of Springfield to go?" Natalia finishes her sentence for her.
"Hey, now," Olivia protests gently. "I'm sure they'll help spread the word."
Natalia can't do anything but laugh again, because Olivia has a point, and she finds that it doesn't bother her. She's okay with people knowing about them, and more than a little bit grateful to Josh for making that moment so easy.
*** *** ***
Olivia is grateful for the shade. The sun has moved on from pleasantly warm and graduated to down right hot. Her shirt sticks uncomfortably to her back and she wonders how Natalia is faring out in the heat. She still has reservations about the other woman running this race with Emma, but knows that Natalia doesn't want to let her daughter down.
"What the hell?"
Tags:
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
Shall we start taking bets? Frank or Rafe?
Great update - love the interaction with both Phillip and Josh.
From:
no subject
Frank? Rafe? I have no idea why you might think they were making a scene.
Great update - love the interaction with both Phillip and Josh.
I really enjoyed writing that part of it. I love their interactions with Olivia on the show, even when she's shoving Josh against the wall. They just have so much history and chemistry that it's fascinating to watch.
From:
no subject
thank you, for your sheer brilliance.
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
Fantastic chapter. So utterly sweet and fluffy but with a realistic basis for their thoughts and actions, and a little of their nervousness showing through. So beautifully characterised. I especially loved the line, "There's no one here - except, perhaps, for Phillip - who's opinion Olivia cares about only because she wants his cooperation to make Emma's life as uncomplicated as possible." Although I may have changed it a little 'about, and only'.
Yes. I'm picky. I know.Wonderfully written. Eagerly anticipating the next installment.
From:
no subject
I know! I want another deliriously happy public moment on the show. But there are so many others that I want too. :( *sigh* I hate that it's going to be over so soon.
Fantastic chapter. So utterly sweet and fluffy but with a realistic basis for their thoughts and actions, and a little of their nervousness showing through. So beautifully characterised. I especially loved the line, "There's no one here - except, perhaps, for Phillip - who's opinion Olivia cares about only because she wants his cooperation to make Emma's life as uncomplicated as possible." Although I may have changed it a little 'about, and only'. Yes. I'm picky. I know.
Your pickiness has been noted and your suggestion used. :) Thank you.
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
I'm looking forward to the wait for the last two installments with...anticipation!
From:
no subject
That's always my favorite part of dropping into the middle of a mostly completed fic. Patience...not my strong suite!
I'm glad you're enjoying it so far!
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From: (Anonymous)
Awesome~
From:
no subject
"If we keep waiting for the perfect moment, or for everyone to be okay with us, we'll never be together and I don't want to have to wait forever to be with you." / The smile that Olivia gives her is brilliant. - Awww. And a-frickin'-men.
Olivia blinks and the look doesn't fade, but it changes, softening just a little. "You make me so happy, you know." / "You make me happy too," Natalia manages to get the words past the lump in her throat. - *heartsqueeze*
Natalia is actually a little bit amazed to be included in this private family moment; because that is exactly what this is - a family moment: mother, father and daughter all together. - *sniff* Makes me sad this didn't happen in the show
Olivia is such a mixture of incredible boldness and shyness. It isn't a matter of one being more true; both emotions coexist in Olivia. - Neat
Love the whole conversation about how each woman has affected the other's life.
Love the whole scene with Josh too. Very funny.
She gathers up her courage and leans forward to rest her chin on Natalia's shoulder, hoping that she won't mind. But this is the reason they came here, to declare to everyone what they are to one another. / To her relief, Natalia leans back, and Olivia exhales as Natalia reaches around to cover Olivia's hand where it's resting on Natalia's side. / "Would you mind letting them know that she's very much taken?" - WOOT! Bad. Ass.
More!!!
From:
no subject
I see Natalia as pretty possessive, but in a more quiet subtle way that still manages to get the point across very effectively. Yet another thing I would have loved to get to see on the show.
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
The second bit of part six will go up on Friday, most likely. :)
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
Heh. I do appreciate the sentiment though. :D
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject